Is this love that I'm feeling
Being in love can be one of the most invigorating feelings that you can experience, but what happens to that love over time? It seems that people are falling out of love, falling into anothers arms, or just plain old falling apart from all the work that's required to sustain the relationship. You see it all the time, the couple you think of as the match made in heaven is somehow headed for Splitsville. It's an unfortunate turn of events but for some reason it's just not working out between them. So how do you make sure this doesn't happen to your relationship?
I'm not sure I have the answer, but I do have some questions you may want to ponder. Some can help you avoid a bad situation or they may explain why you have one. Either way, here are some questions that deserve to be answered.
1) Have we discussed having children. If so, who is expected to be the primary care giver?
2) Do we know each other's finacial background: spending habits, financial obligations, future financial goals?
3) What feeling are there surrounding domestic responsibilities? Are you a neat freak and your mate a slob? Who will be responsible for what chores?
4) Have you fully disclosed your health histories, will your past come back to haunt you when you decide to have children? Do you have any physical and/or mental impairments?
5) How much affection do you like to give/recieve?
6) Can the both of you discuss sexual needs, preferences and fears?
7) Will there be a television, computer, work, music, etc. in the bedroom?
8) Do we truly listen to each other and fairly consider one another’s ideas and complaints or do we just tolerate the one another?
9) Are we in agreement regarding our need for spirituality? Do we have similar spiritual beliefs? What are our views on exposing our children to religious/moral teaching?
10) Do we like and respect each other’s friends?
11) Do we value and respect each other’s parents, and is either of us concerned about whether the parents will interfere with the relationship?
12) What does my family do that annoys you?
13) Are there some things that you and I are NOT prepared to give up in the marriage?
14) If one of us were to be offered a career opportunity in a location far from the other’s family, are we prepared to move?
15) Does each of us feel fully confident in the other’s commitment to the marriage and believe that the bond can survive whatever challenges we may face?
As you can see, all of these are pertinent questions and deserve to be brought to the table before you make a decision that will change your life as you know it. For some reason, love and relationships have been heavy on my mind. I guess it's because, in the last year I have watched relationships fall under trying times and some have deteriorated due to varying issues. However, I think many of the problems could have been avoided had the parties taken the time to ask the tough questions and held their ground when those answers were not to their liking.
Scripted by Rich Fitzgerald