Just a bit of an experiment. I hope you find it enjoyable.
She looks like a Veronica; a heart ache waiting to happen. At least that's what I convinced myself of when I threw her business card out the window as I turned the corner that breezy night. Blow away. Blow away far from me.
I just made her acquaintance and I was already having difficulty managing the memory of our seventy eight minute encounter. Not that she was super model fine or anything, but I was sure that we could have had some good times together. We had a vibe that was immediately rhythmic; like musical notes strung together against a nice bass line, the kind you enjoy in a dimly lit club, the kind that you couldn't help but bob your head to. Her confidence was all the sexy she needed. I liked that. It didn't matter if she wasn't the finest lady in attendance, she sold me on who she was. Had me pulling her into my conscious like a slow drag on a cigarette. With every sentence I took another puff. I didn't want to exhale. I wanted to hold on to the feeling as long as possible...inhale, hold, now breathe.
She was digging me too. I knew it. Her eyes betrayed her innocence one too many times. Caught her checking me out. All of me. She even took the time to notice and comment on things. Things I was too distracted to remember about my evenings preparation, like color combinations and clean scented cologne. But that wasn't what did it. It was her presentation. She was so smooth. I wanted her to choose me. I was no longer in the drivers seat. Game had been shifted. No wonder she was in sales, had me ready to buy whatever she was offering. And it didn't hurt that she seemed well versed in man. Even taught me a thing or two about cigars. As it turned out, my complimentary stogy was a Dominican, grown from Cuban seeds. Not nearly as good as a Cuban and it smelled noticeably louder. She even recommended that if I wanted a real cigar I should try an Argentina brand.
It was little stuff like that. Stuff that let me know that she was smart and fun. She seemed carefree, the type of girl who didn't make a fuss. Didn't provide a lot of drama. You know, Fun Girl. Always a good time to be had. As I continued to swallow her beguiling words sans the chewing I heard my conscious tell me no. What do you mean no? If I've ever seen a 'go' in my life, this one was it. She was the perfect woman to keep in ones pocket. "Marriage is something I've never wanted," she stated so matter of fact. Those words caught me by surprise. Pushed me on my heels despite the fact that I was sitting. Oh, it's like that, I thought. I wondered if she was a freak. The kind of girl that would invite me over knowing full well what she had in store. She didn't look the part, but those are the best kind, the unassuming ones.
"So what about love? Do you ever fall in love?" I questioned.
"Sure, I've fallen in love many times."
"So what happened. You didn't love them enough to want to marry them."
"Like I said, that's not what I want."
"What about them? What about what they want?"
"I tell them up front that I'm not interested in marriage, but I guess at some point I become a challenge. Like they are going to show me something about myself that I don't already know."
I chuckled. She reminded me of myself. That's what I told women. "I only want to have fun, nothing serious." But my warnings fell on deaf ears, just like her words had done on the men in her past. Talking to her became clairvoyant. I realized that I was looking in the mirror. I never knew my image could be so chilling. I was even slightly annoyed by the callousness of it all. Too bad it wasn't enough to sway the attraction I felt for her. She was vanity personified. She had me overcome with the possibility of dating me. Now wouldn't that be interesting.
So there I sat behind the drivers seat of my ride trying to convince myself that I could handle just being friends. Who was I fooling. Just seeing her name typed in black ink was causing me uneasiness. Kayla Davenport. Each time I read it I was placed back into that space with her. Seated at our outdoor table, activity all around us as we laughed and talked about the other patrons of the speak easy. I was seated just to her left. The perfect location for taking in her good side. No way I could fall for this girl. She was a heart ache waiting to happen. I looked at the card again, my buzz made me pull it in a little closer. Her cell number. It was there too. Not this girl , I heard myself say. Just toss the number. That's just what I'll do. I was sure of it. As I turned the corner, I tossed it. Made sure my speed was high enough to make it blow away. Blow away far from me. I turn up the music to try and drown the thoughts pressing against my conscious. I reach for my cell, press the numbers.
"Hello," she said. I dialed it right, I thought as my heartbeat regained it's normal pace. I can just be her friend, I'm sure of it.