Friday

Vanity Plates


Here’s one of my little quirks. I like to read vanity license plates. I love figuring them out when they are coded and at times the wording will evoke my desire to take a closer look because of what they have spelled out on the plate. Such was the case this week when I happened to pull up behind a car in traffic that had “MS IT” on the plate.

If I leave five minutes later than normal traffic has the tendency to be bumper to bumper for quite a while. Well, this particular morning I didn’t get out until thirty minutes later than my usual time cause mommy and I had breakfast in bed, if you know what I mean. Anyway, as I’m heading into the flow of traffic where I-55 merges into I-70 headed west, I see this burgundy Mazda 626 in front of me and being the license plate reader that I am, I notice the tag. I’m doubtful that the driver looks the part of “MS IT” because I don’t know how many times I’ve ridden up on someone with “Q T PIE”, “SEX C 1”, “MMM GUD” or something along those lines only to be utterly disappointed at my findings. Nevertheless, I’m the curious sort, so I try and find my way along side of “MS IT”, only to be blocked by my non-driving fellow commuters. Finally, some ten minutes later I’m able to get over in the open lane where I-70 crosses Union. The road always opens up there because it is the end of the “Express Lane” – Is it me or does it always seem like those things are headed in the wrong direction? Anywho, I speed up and hit the lane before “MS IT” has the chance and I catch a glance. Not bad I think, but I didn’t get a good enough look and I’m still not really convinced that she is all that, at least enough of 'that' to be advertising on her tag. So, I slow my roll a bit and allow her to catch up and I look again. Just ok, I think, but she isn’t an ugly chick, so I won't put her in the category with all the other folks. I guess she was speaking more of her attitude than looks, but who am I to judge her. Besides, she gave me something to do since I missed the reading of “The Strawberry Letter” this morning on the Steve Harvey Morning Show – which is another topic altogether, because I miss my local morning show.

Meanwhile, back on the ranch, all this license plate reading got me to thinking. If I had to have a vanity plate, what would I put on it? Missouri only allows six letters, but I can come up with a few. What about you, what would you put on your plate? Here are some of mine.

P2P LLC (Poorhouse 2 Powerhouse – my educational company that I plan to debut soon).

R SANDR
SANDER (My former writing pseudonym was R. Sander Fitzgerald– I decided to drop the name “Sander”)

GD READ (Good Read)

FLY GUY (I wouldn’t dare – just tossing ideas around)

BIZ MAN (See Mizrepresent and CapCity for the meaning to that one)

GR8FL (I think that one is taken)

RNAZNS (as in Renaissance Man)

I have others, but I’d rather see yours.

One last tidbit -- I like reading car tags so much, I came up with a game called TAGZ years ago that I tried selling to the toy companies. Unfortunately, most board games are just classics now. Everyone wants something electronic. I, on the other hand, just want to have a little fun. So, come on, amuse me with your vanity plates.

28 comments:

Anonymous said...

Good Post. I have a vanity plate that most people don't figure out or they just figure out the first part and not the last part. Can you figure it out? DIVA2DE.

Rich Fitzgerald said...

It's either Diva-tude (as in diva attitude) or "Diva-to-'d'-end".

Am I correct?

Sheletha said...

my guess is like diva 2 Deleware, er something, nevermind Im lame.

My vanity plate would be Manuel3.
I always envisioned when all of my sisters are at my parents house all of our plates would say Manuel1, 2 &3. But it would only make sense if my sisters did it as well. Its like our last name and order of birth.

That was back when we had nice, simple, blue plates not the fuckery that we have now.

Sheletha said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Shai said...

Rich, I think it is Diva-Tude. LOL.

Saadia said...

Illinois allows 7 letters or characters and I would choose:
THIRSTY.

I've wanted to do it for a while, but Dave is totally against it. His words: "You get enough attention as it is."

Rich Fitzgerald said...

Girly Girl you asking for trouble. I can see them rolling up telling you they got what you thirsty for.

Listen to Dave!

Chari said...

Lol, cute post.

Mine would prob say ChariT or GodLuv. Something like that.

Sheletha said...

ohhh divatude!!!! yeah that fits!

CapCity said...

i also love vanity plates. my fave to date was this white boy's in college (that wasn't UN PC of me was it? lol): PHKN A (on a camaro, of course;-).

...yea, i went to college in a beach area. LOL!

mine mite be:
Li'l Red
-or-
MIZE
... or some other play on the fact that i drive a MINI;-)

Sheletha said...

The motor city is notorious for vanity plates too...like I said it was best when the plates were just plain blue.

Sheletha said...

thats cute cap!! the best vanity plate that i saw said PAID 4. LOVED IT!!! too bad it was a hoopty

CapCity said...

tha's what made Paid 4 priceless, Sheletha - cuz it was a hoopty!

most that i see on Fly cars are boring...there's a nice slk in my 'hood w/ 2ND LOOK, I've also seen UNV ME & others that come off making me want to gag....

wonder what i'll put on my maybach or bentley ... - LKMA NODEBT;-)

CapCity said...

oh, sheletha, i just read your earlier comment about birth order...since my sibs & i have same initials we'd be cap1, 2, 3 & 4(me;-)...which would be fun...but sibs...u just gotta luv 'em...

Lance said...

i'on kno'....the vanity plate on the back of my BLACK LAMBORGHINI MURCIELAGO ROADSTER, i just purchased, *ahem*, is gonna be IH8SUVS

***for all you suv driving fuckers in the fast lane, going slow****

move bitch, git out da way!!!!!!

Rich Fitzgerald said...

Yo Lance,
Can a brother get a hundred g's. I'll pay it back next year this time. That's a fly ride.

http://www.rsportscars.com/eng/cars/murcielago_roadster.asp

Mizrepresent said...

Mine will be simple Rich, even though i don't have any now, i think if i ever got one it would read, STPHATIN...holla if you hear me!

CapCity said...

Hey Lance - where da hayl u been & why u been neglecting me? LOL! but u made me think of what i should put on my mini = NEEDmoGAS? I laugh when suv's fly pass me cuz they can't "let" a li'l thing like me zip by. i shake my head & think i'll pass u at the next gas station anyway. ROFLMAO!!

Suite B said...

I love vanity plates...

I hate that damn express lane on I-70...

and I can't believe you listen to The Steve Harvey Morning Show

Shelia said...

I like MizRepresents "STPHATIN".

When I get my Jag...it would be something corny like MYJAG.

If I were to get one now, it would be CATCHUP...because folks are always trying to race me...and unless they're in another sports car, they don't stand a chance. :)

Tasha said...

I've got a vanity plate too, and of course cuz I have to rep where I come from it's N8V NYR. People are always asking me what it means. *sigh*

Suite B said...

Tasha: I like that "Native New Yorker

Don said...

The only time I ever had a personalized tag was on a 96 Impala I once had.

It said 4giveus

If I can ever get a ride of my desire again ... knowing what I know now, I wouldn't get a personalized tag.

Anonymous said...

I enjoyed the read, but have no suggestion.

Anonymous said...

Your first thought was the correct thought. Your good.

Ticia said...

Hey!!

I wouldn't get personalized plates...

I am too scared.. LOL--

I don't have a suggestion--
Sorry :(

Lisa Steptoe said...

We once had a plate - "ewellness" when we owned an online health & wellness business.

I never really liked having it though. Wouldn't do it again.

Unknown said...

Rich, you are officially my favorite Jamaican (think "In Living Color")! How many businesses do you have, man? I'm taking lessons...

I'm not a vanity plate kinda guy, but I have a suggestion:

D2AGREE

It fits the way the Mrs. and I live this life.

Speaking of "the Mrs."... glad to know you old folks still get your "breakfast in bed"... that's the way to do it!