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Hypothetically Speaking.
“Benny! Can you explain to me what this means?” Caroline said in loud accusatory tones. Benjamin Kneadmore , heavy in the throes of slumber, continued to lay motionless as his afternoon nap was being rudely interrupted by Caroline’s incessant jabbing to his shoulder.
“What…,” he said before fading out only to feel the pointed finger impugning his relaxed deltoid. “What!” he then blurted between cracked vocals as he scurried to ascertain just what the problem was now. Lifting his eyes like a well sprung pull shade, he turned from the pillow and began taking in the image of Caroline, his wife of a few good years, standing with her left arm attached to her hip and her right hand displaying his cell phone. He knew at that moment that he didn’t need to see her face to tell this wasn’t going to be pretty.
“This!” she continued. “Can you explain to me the meaning of these text messages from Naomi?”
“What are you talking about?” Benny said reaching for the phone while making sure his puzzled facial expression was firmly in tact. While glancing at the messages he yawned and wondered, “I thought I deleted all of those.”
Reading his expression, she followed with, “I bet you thought you erased them all, but there they were waiting to be found. I’ve had this sinking feeling that you’ve been messing around and I wish you would just tell me the truth!”
“Not this subject again,” Benny said as he rolled his eyes, an act to ensure that his body language didn’t betray him. Mr. Kneadmore had managed to keep Naomi a secret for months. She was an administrative assistant in his office, someone he innocently took a liking to during their time of working on the Philadelphia Commons Acquisition Project. What started out as lunch and a little relationship advice had spilled over into something quite different. The text messages were harmless. Benny knew she didn’t have anything there. However, Mr. Kneadmore’s and Naomi’s history was another matter altogether. Now that Caroline was on to him, Benny didn’t know how far she would go before she came upon the truth.
“Is there something going on between the two of you?” Caroline inquired further.
Mr. Kneadmore didn’t respond. He just gave off a blank stare as his mind was drawn to the thoughts of Naomi. In those split seconds, images of Naomi filled his conscious. Benny thought about how he never intended to go after this woman. How one day out of nowhere she just took up residence. Now, presented with Caroline’s question, Benny’s first thought was to lie. He could likely get away with it, but to be honest, he wanted to put an end to the speculation. Go back to the way things used to be between him and Caroline. Over the course of time things had grown unsettled between them. Every other week or so he was denying any wrong doing that her intuition warned her of otherwise. A time during which he realized he needed to distance himself from Naomi or risk losing Caroline. Mr. Kneadmore wanted peace. He didn’t like the riotous volatility that had resulted from his inattentiveness of Caroline. She could tell something was awry, so she had taken him to task on everything from working late to the reasoning behind his change of hairstyle. He repeatedly denied wrong doing, but Caroline would not cease until she got to the bottom of the matter. With that in mind, Benjamin wondered, what if it came out later? Would Caroline leave him for having lied? Maybe he’d just tell her what she wanted to hear and get it over with. Tell her the absolute dirty truth. If Caroline was going to ever hear of it, their relationship would fare better if the admission came from him.
Benjamin stared beyond Caroline as his thoughts darted fiercely through his mind. Benny loved Caroline something awful; Mr. Kneadmore had just momentarily lost his way. She could understand that couldn’t she? With the moment upon him and no time to prepare, Benny didn’t know which way he wanted to turn. “Answer me!” Caroline finally demanded, “Is there something going on between you and this Naomi woman?” Just as he was about to speak, his cell rang. He looked at the number. It was Naomi.
Hypothetically speaking if you found yourself in this predicament, what would you do? Feel free to answer from either characters perspective.
Additional question:
Benjamin spoke of loving Caroline. Do you think it is possible to truly love someone and engage in an act of deception? Does love make concessions for those actions?
From a woman’s perspective, do men fair better if they just tell the truth about indiscretions. Why or why not?
About the host:
Rich Fitzgerald is the author of the short story "One to Remember" featured in Love and Redemption (Bloggers' Delight Vol. 1), a collection of short stories by authors who blog. To read excerpts or to order a copy of the title, visit i-Lit. The book is also available on Amazon.
22 comments:
the truth will set u free
but some folk feel as if lying is best
because they are weak minded and cant handle taking responsibility for their actions
@ Rich
A true playa would never get jammed up at the line of scrimmage like this. Nevertheless, you have to do what most men would do in this situation...TELL A LIE!
Take it to the grave. Just do like OJ did...tell the lie long enuf to where you actually believe it!
Good one, Rich. I enjoyed Don's blog.
Torrance is right . . .the truth will set you free.
Free to get the hell out my house.
I'm feeding you, giving you all my attention, massaging feet, rubbing your back, providing support (emotional and financial), not to mention mind-blowing sex and you out there doing what with who.
What Beyonce say?
To the left to the left. All your s**t is in a box to the left on the sidewalk. Now step.
@Kyle. . .we all knew from the moment they said OJ was a suspect taking the police on that slow speed chase. . .HE DID IT.
There are no true playas just blind women. Or women who feel that something with a cheater is better than nothing alone.
1. I'd rather hear the truth from him than to hear the lie and find out the truth later
2. I do not think it is possible to truly love someone and commit adultery at the same time. I am able to forgive, but I've never been able to forget.
3. For a man, admitting the truth you may get slapped. To lie about the indiscretion, you may get your ... clipped.
Some spirited comments so far.
All Mi T - so u just put it all on the line. I can dig that.
Kyle - Hmmm. I've always been told that honesty is the best policy, but I sure feel you. That gut instinct says avoid trouble at all costs.
Sharon, sounds like I struck a nerve. LOL.
Sista GP, your response sounds like Mrs. Rich.
LOL, Great women think alike.
@ Sharon
I feel you. My response was a joke. lol. I think you have to be honest...tell the truth...then duck. haaaaa
@Rich. . . no nerve struck. I'm just not the one.
There is no forgive and forget. Once you soil the marriage bed it is stained.
For the record my marriage did not end due to cheating. There were issues way beyond. And honestly I probably would have cheated if I didn't leave. It was over nine years before it ended (went ten).
I didn't want people to read my comment and think I was an angry cheated on black woman.
I got a million other reasons to be angry.
@Kyle. . .I didn't take it seriously. You wrote OJ.
Gald you know to be honest.
he needs to go ahead and tell the truth. lying only makes it worse for when the truth really does comes out it wont be nice.
as for Caroline, she knows that something is going on. She needs to hire "Cheaters", no Im just kidding. But that show will get down to the nitty gritty,lol
Lord if that was me and that woman would have called his phone, i probaby would have went ballistic. my ex did that to me once. had someone calling his phone in the middle of sex, damn near had me acting a fool up in there. thanks God I am done with those days
i didn't even NEED to read the post! LOL! the comments were hot enough! Sharon up in here puh-REACHING! Brothers crax me up thanking they got game & the truth iz women put up with shyt 'til they get tired!
I'm not EVEN bitter - just got my EYES WIDE open - which most men don't like. I've been told more than enuff that I got too much mouth;-). When the truth IZ i force a Brother to look inward & THEY HATE THAT!!! But, I'm feeling a Skrong Bruthah in my vicinity cuming sooner than I know;-) - Belee DAT!
Y'all only miss Don cuz of all the chix his blog attracted! LOLOLOL!
But - i DO wish he had let me save that HEAD post & comments before he shut it down! LOL! That was my fave post of his! ;-)
Tell the truth bruh...if it's in your heart, and if it was one mistake...tell the truth, but if you are really not feeling your woman anymore and "the grass is greener" is more your feel, then spill it and let go. We both deserve love, we both deserve respect as one one of my fav bloggers would say "don't shit in my hand and say it's lotion"...just don't. Do the the right thing and let us together or apart, move on. Now that's real talk!
Of course I agree with the virtues of telling the truth to avoid a bigger drama in the event that the cheater were to lie and subsequently have the truth come out...but let me submit another scenario.
We are such optimists, us humans that we cling to this ideology that the truth ALWAYS comes to light. I myself have been guilty of this same thinking, but if I am absolutely honest, I would have no choice but to admit that sometimes, the truth NEVER shows up. So my question is in that case, what?
Though an absolute realist (and the proof of that is my admission of the fact stated above), who never intentionally buries her head in the sand, I'd say I would want the truth. However, knowing as I do that the likelihood of me being able to get beyond the cheating is pretty much nil, I have to add that if indeed this is a man I love and who I believe loves me and won't cheat again, I must admit that maybe this is something he should lie about and take to the grave if he possibly can as anything else would most likely end any chance of continuing the relationship.
Go easy folk, I'm just being real...
i know i've said i "want the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth"
and when i got it, ended up getting my feelings hurt
big time
so, i say honesty in doses
i guess.
-1-
The truth hurts. Lying is just a method of trying to control the consequences of your actions. It may be ugly the reactions from telling the truth, it is uglier if you lie and then the truth is found out. Karma can be bitch.
Well...If I were Caroline. I wouldn't wait for his confession because nine times out of ten he's not going to confess. If she has enough proof that he is cheating then she should act on that.
Now me being Caroline would have to decide okay he's cheating. Now what? Not if he's cheating.
I would probably leave his ass. Unless I felt there was something there left to salvage. But with my unforgiving personality. We would probably split on my terms not on his. When he least expect it!
Hmmm...
I enjoyed this post... and the comments as well.
If I were Caroline, I'd be out. This fool is a cheating bastard and ain't no telling what he could be bringing home.
Benjamin needs to keep it real. Don't have this woman wasting her life with yo cheatin triflin ass.
If he were a real man, he'd keep it real and suffer the consequences, cause eventually, it'll come out in the light.
Confession is for the Confessor...
Remember that.
Women know when their man is cheating, they may or may not act like it, but they know...
Which is to say that unless you are ready to pack your bags you may keep telling yourself those lies, and listening to those lies.
Until you are ready to confront you own truth it doesn't matter what anyone else says.
And if I were Caroline I would probably answer my man's phone and say "We were just talking about how you'd been screwing my husband...your ears must be ringing"
If I was Benjamin I would tell the truth....you never know she might be able to forgive him and work with him to make the marriage stronger....
If I was Caroline I would definetly answer that phone..wait was it in her hands or his? But anyway I have been in a situation where my intuition has told me something was going on..she knows he's cheating I would leave, not neccesarily a divorce but maybe a legal seperation...
And Naomi should have enough respect for herself to deal with a man who is not married....
Oh and to answer the other questions do I think its possible to love someone and engage in deception...Yes I do think that you can love someone and at the same time decieve them...and as a woman I think its better if a man confesses that way a woman can have a choice in what she wants to do of whether she should stay or go..but when you decieve her she is participating in a relationship by herself in which everyone is not on the same playing field...
Slish and I were having this conversation...he says what makes him a great liar is that he BELIEVES his lies...therefore making them reality to him. He's an ass! lol
However, I am with AJ, we know already...so your truth is just confirmation.
I will say, you lie to me...and I find out...is much worse than if you tell me the truth. Once I found out you lied, usually gives you an expiration date stamped to your forehead...there is no longer a future.
As for me being involved and cheating...that's not going to happen. If we are in a committed relationship and I go outside that...then I need to walk away from it. There are no accidents...cheating is a choice.
Whew. Some good comments.
If I were him I would tell the truth. Love is unselfish and lieing is selfish. Period.
If I were his wife I would have left and went to a girlfriends house to stop me from killing him. 4real.
That's my four cents. Thanks :) lol.
GREAT hypothetical Rich, love it!
I understand why people feel the need to lie. But the truth will ALWAYS come to light sooner or later. Instead of having Caroline heartbroken by his affair, he will one day have her heartbroken by his affair AND her trust in him completely shattered when she realizes that he sat in front of her face and straight up lied to her.
If you are strong enough to do it, be strong enough to admit it.
You've already hurt that person once with your wrong doing. Don't add deceptions and lies on top of the pain.
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